remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize