Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
