I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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