We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
there is glitter all over my balls
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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