People in love make me want to vomit
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
