The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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