You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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