woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
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