What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
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