Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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