so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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