dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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