is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize