id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Randomize