Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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