I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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