sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
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