So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
