if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
handjob tips. give me some.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
