The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize