Four minutes until I can fart!
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
