dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
