cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
