I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
