on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
