Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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