How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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