You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Rumble strips road head = magical
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
