The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
