So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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