the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
