I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
