Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
What happened to fro yo and sex?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
