I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
