I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
