need another drink. this is the easiest way
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
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