R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
