this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
