It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
