that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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