after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
