Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
