I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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