is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
