awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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