Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
