dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
