the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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