You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
