apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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