halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
