Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
